Thursday Night Rant: “I’m Sorry!”

Boy howdy I’d love to be mindlessly binging TV right now. Instead I’m writing… this.

If there’s one thing I am growing entirely intolerant of it’s the inability of people to apologize. Two to three times every week I make a mistake or a misstep and have to say I’m sorry. Or pardon me. Or please forgive me. And every time I do I learn a little more about my shared humanity.

There are some people who are so insecure or self-righteous that to acknowledge any error, let alone say they’re sorry, is inconceivable. The older I get, the less patience I have for this toxic behavior.

I once had an employer screw up my benefits such that I incurred out-of-pocket costs between $500 and $1,000. The benefits provider said that they would accept an effective policy date change resulting in me being made whole. Even though the benefits administrator admitted fault, they refused to fix the situation, instead blaming the provider.

Less than a year later, the same administrator overpaid me by $14,000 on a single check (something I’d forgotten, because I’m a forgiving guy, until discussing it with my mom today). Rather than going to my supervisor or the owner of the company, I went to the administrator and gave them a chance to fix their error - without losing face.

In neither case did I receive an apology for the mistakes or my inconvenience. And that’s pretty sad.

Teach your kids to apologize. Lead by example in the workplace and be willing to admit (and make right) your own mistakes. I get that it can be tough. But a person who admits their errors isn’t weak because they confess mistakes. Everybody makes mistakes.

Embarrassment and the threat of a reduction in status is the most uncomfortable thing many of us face in the West. It’s not death. You’re not living in Ukraine. So stop with the soap opera denial.

Understand that when you acknowledge your errors you are receiving an incredible opportunity for personal and professional growth. When you cast aspersions on others in an attempt to dodge legitimate criticism, you’ve failed nobody as much as you have yourself. You’re undermining your future success.

Apologizing requires humility. But unless you learn to say you’re sorry…

…chances are pretty good you’ll just end up SORRY.